Saint Nick vs. Christ

imageSaint Nicholas the Wonderworker of Myra. 

Saint Nicholas was born in a the village of Patara -located in modern day Turkey- on March 15, AD270. He was raised by his parents into his early teenage years when his parents died. Already being extraordinarily religious Nicholas went into the care of his Uncle -also named Nicholas- who was the Bishop of Patara. Nicholas climbed through the ranks of the church and became the bishop to another town in modern day Turkey, Myra, at a young age. 

Nicholas dedicated his life to serving god and doing as the bible told him. When his parents died he sold all of his inheritance and gave it to benefit the poor. 

Nicholas became known for his love of children and concern for sailors. 

Under the rule of Roman Emperor Diocletian, Nicholas was imprisoned and exiled for his faith. At this time many church officials where prosecuted and jailed. Filling the jails to capacity and leaving the murderers, thieves, and rapists to roam free. When Nicholas was finally released, he attended the Council of Nicaea (AD325) to preserver the unity of the church.

Nicholas died December 6, Ad 343 in Myra. He was buried in he Cathedral  where a unique relic manna formed in his grave. A manna is a pool of pure water that forms in the tomb of a Saint. It was formally believed to be oil leaking in, but is now known to be pure water. Manna are said to have healing powers. When this pool forms it fosters a great love for the Saint.

Suicide Tea

To make your self some suicide tea, you must first go out and find yourself some lilies. Dig them up. include the entire bulb if you can. Collect as many as you can. After cleaning them carefully and well, unless you enjoy the taste of dirt.. cut of the flower part of the plant and set them aside. Strip any leaves and chock the stem into small peaces, as small as you can make them. Then move onto chopping or mincing the bulb. When you’ve finished this, put them in a jar and set them aside. Preheat your oven to 250 while you spread the flower heads on a cookie sheet. Place them in the oven to and leave the door open slightly and check on the frequently. When they are dry, crush them up and put them up into another jar. When you are ready to make your tea, place a large portion of stems and bulb in the bottom of your cup then fill it with water, and heat it for 2-4 minutes in the microwave. Add the crushed head, to the water once it is heated, and let it steap for quite some time. At least 5 minutes. When you are ready you may drink. Soon after consumption your liver will start to fail.

NOTE: I have not tested this. Lilies really are poious. DO NOT TRY THIS!!!!