I Want To Be Me. (:

Have you ever noticed how when you’re not allowed to move, you always get itchy?

I am sick of the world I live in.

I’m sick of all the people who pretend to be nice to you when in reality they think the worst of you. If you don’t like someone, stay away from them when you can and just be civil when you can’t. Don’t act like you care, unless you care!

I’m sick of people who try to play others for sex or money. Why do people feel the need to hurt other people. You don’t have to be a jerk to go places. You don’t have to be a jerk to get what you want.

I’m sick of people not believing that I was raped and people thinking that terrible things are okay. 

I’m sick of the way people are always judging people at face value. Never looking beyond the surface or trying to get to know a person. Talking behind peoples back, saying things they have no right to say. If they didn’t do anything to you, why are you being such an ass hole? What does that accomplish. It doesn’t make people like you! No one is going to like someone that talks about everyone behind their back. They would be too afraid that you would talk about them too. Anyone who ‘likes’ someone like that is probably just using them and is no better than they are. Does it really make people feel better to bash on people that never did anything wrong to them?

I’m sick of being surrounded by people who don’t understand me, the way I think, or why I am the way I am. I hate being surrounded about people who say they care when I know very well they don’t mean it.

My whole life I’ve done my best to never judge anyone or anything based on and outward appearance or act. Never assuming the worst in people. Always thinking of possible reasons why they may be a certain unappealing why. For example, when the care in front of me is driving terribly, I don’t get angry I think about how perhaps this is their first time on the road or they are incredible stressed out because they have just heard news of someone close to them getting badly hurt. I never assume that they must be a terrible driver simply because they are not driving well right now. If I however noticed this car driving this way on numerous occasions I may thing otherwise. Another example: Maybe I see someone being rather rude when someone asks them for help. Instead of thinking this person is all around rude, I would wonder if perhaps these people have a history that warrants the rudeness. Or perhaps this person is going through a rough time and the other person reminds them greatly of someone who has caused them a great amount of distress. 

I’ve always tried to see the best in others. Despite this I have been targeted and bullied and so much more.  

I’m done thinking all people have good in them. I’m done. I am a nice and caring person. If I see someone I don’t know having a hard time, I will help them, with no expectation of anything in return. Yet everyone I know has proved to be not trust worthy for some reason or another. Sure I can have a bad temper and I can get rather defensive, but only when people hit a sore spot. Like saying it’s my fault someone did something to themselves (attempt at suicide or cutting type thing) or saying terrible things about my family. I have other sore spots as well, but they are all thing I have EVERY Right to get upset over. And Sure I’m bi polar, but that doesn’t mean I’m a bad person. It just mean I’m troubled.  

So many people like me are misjudged and mistreated. And they shouldn’t be. Okay so we have problems, but if we never did anything to you personally, then why are being so mean?

I’m not strong enough to change to world, and I’m done doing the best I can. The world won’t change. I can’t make them see the light. I now choose to begin to separate and isolate myself from the people in this world. 

I don’t believe it to be right, the way people treat others in society. I pray the world gives me a reason to continue on in society, but I don’t see it happening. 

lovelylittlewolf:

whyamisorandom:

I support same-sex marriage!

It isn’t racist to only be attracted to people with certain skin tones. You’re mind can’t control what turns your body on. It just happens. You can still think someone is beautiful, pretty, or handsome without having to be attracted to them. Calling someone racist for not having the hots for someone of a certain race is like calling anyone who isn’t bi sexual or pan-sexual sexist for not having the hots of people of all genders. 

Someone is not racist just because they don’t want a romantic relationship with someone that has a certain skin tone. Just because they can’t get wet or get a boner or develop a yearning to be with that person romantically and sexually when they look at someone who is pale as snow or tan as hell or naturally darker or any other things like that doesn’t mean they are racist.

Of course here are a lot of people out there who base who they have sex with on race in a racist manner, but that doesn’t mean all people who don’t think Asians are arousing are racist. This goes for all other races and ethnicitys as well.

You can’t call someone racist solely based on who they get romantically involved in. It will be evident in other aspects of their life as well. 

There are some people out there who can’t find people of there own race sexually attractive. There are Africans and African-Americans, who won’t date anyone who isn’t Caucasian. And there are Asians that will only date African-Americans.. I hope you get the pattern. 

Racism is very real, but some people interpret things to be racist when they aren’t really. I mean, think about it, really think about it. Another way to look at is, maybe the Universe decided to give some people a hand in finding their soul mate by making it so their body is only attracted to people who are Asian or Latino, because that’s what their soul mate is. 

Judging the masses so similarly and easily without looking into things more deeply isn’t much better than being racist. It’s like saying all blonds are dumb or all Irish are alcoholics or that people with glasses are all smart. Not everyone who doesn’t get romantically involved with African-Americans is racist towards African-Americans.